


ma

by goldenthunderstorms



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes - Fandom, The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Hanging, Heavy Angst, I Hate Coriolanus Snow, I finished the book last night, POV Third Person Limited, Retelling, Sad Ending, Sejanus Plinth Deserved Better, Sejanus is gay and you will not change my mind, Spoilers for Book: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes, TBOSAS spoilers, The Hanging Tree (Hunger Games), and I already miss Sejanus, no beta we die like sejanus, romantic relationships aren't talked about much, so I wrote this, take the relationships with a large grain of salt, this is just sad, too soon?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-28
Updated: 2020-05-28
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:34:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24418201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldenthunderstorms/pseuds/goldenthunderstorms
Summary: "Sejanus hoped, at the very least, this would be the end of things. Not just for him, but for the problems that he caused everyone around him. For Coryo and for Ma.Oh, Ma. Did Ma know what was happening? Sejanus wasn’t sure. He hadn’t been allowed to see or talk to anyone other than the commander. Coryo would make sure that she knew, though Sejanus expected that she would be told when it was all said and done, when it was too late for his father to dig into his ever-growing pockets. Sejanus wondered what his father would say about his plans. Sejanus could hear the lecture in his head: about all that his father sacrificed for Sejanus to have a better life than he could have had in Two, about how Sejanus never stopped throwing away opportunities because of his foolish district sentimentalities. Sejanus didn’t know what his father expected. Sejanus spent the first eight years of his life in Two, and it wasn’t like anyone in the Capitol made efforts to make him feel welcome. Sejanus was district, through and through, no matter how much money his father poured out to wash it away."Sejanus reflects before his execution.
Relationships: Lucy Gray Baird & Sejanus Plinth, Lucy Gray Baird/Corliolanus Snow, Sejanus Plinth & Coriolanus Snow, Sejanus Plinth & Ma Plinth
Comments: 25
Kudos: 49





	ma

**Author's Note:**

> I finished TBOSAS last night and it broke me  
> I love Sejanus Plinth so much and I miss him so much so I wrote this to help myself cope  
> If not made obvious by the tags and description, this is Sejanus's execution (and a little bit before) through his POV

Sejanus realized that he loved Coriolanus when Coriolanus saved him from the arena.

Sejanus knew that sounded stupid. He would probably say he loved anyone who saved his life. But he  _ loved  _ Coryo. Sejanus had always appreciated him, ever since they were children and Coryo had the mercy to spare Sejanus, unlike their classmates, who enjoyed tormenting him. Then Coriolanus became something of an idol to Sejanus: unbothered, untouchable, powerful, beautiful. The perfect image of everything Sejanus wished he could be.

Sure, the Plinths had plenty of power, in Sejanus’s father’s pockets. But Sejanus was never able to  _ own it  _ the way Coryo could. Sejanus supposed that made sense. Coriolanus was Capitol born and raised. The Capitol was Coryo’s home. The Capitol was never Sejanus’s home. No matter how badly he wished it, nothing made him  _ feel  _ at home there.

Until Coryo. Until the Games, bloody and gruesome and cruel as they were, brought Coriolanus to the forefront of Sejanus’s life. Coryo was the one good thing to come from that entire nightmare for Sejanus. At least, that’s what Sejanus told himself as he sat in prison, waiting to be executed.

_ Executed _ .

He didn’t know what he expected to happen when he was found out.  _ Was  _ he found out? Sejanus couldn’t figure out what had happened. How did the Peacekeepers find out about the plan? Were they able to get it out of Spruce before he died? There was always the other possibility that Sejanus refused to think about, the possibility that —

No. Coryo would never. He was all Sejanus had, here or anywhere. The only person Sejanus trusted completely. The escape plan must have gotten out somehow. Someone must have heard, or told. Maybe Sejanus wasn’t as careful as he thought that he’d been. He only told Coryo but maybe someone else overheard them. Maybe one of those birds had picked up what he said.

Regardless, Coryo had been right, as usual. Sejanus had wanted to do something to help the districts and failed miserably. Sejanus wasn’t going to be able to help anyone ever again.

Sejanus thought of what Marcus said to him, the things that Marcus called him. Sejanus couldn’t forget the hatred that burns in Marcus. He couldn’t forget how Marcus told him that he wished Sejanus was in that arena instead of him.

_ Wish granted,  _ thought Sejanus. But Sejanus couldn’t bring himself to feel anything for Marcus, a boy who was once his best friend, other than pity and regret. Sejanus didn’t do enough for him and Sejanus would never be able to. Sejanus hoped, at the very least, this would be the end of things. Not just for him, but for the problems that he caused everyone around him. For Coryo and for Ma.

Oh, Ma. Did Ma know what was happening? Sejanus wasn’t sure. He hadn’t been allowed to see or talk to anyone other than the commander. Coryo would make sure that she knew, though Sejanus expected that she would be told when it was all said and done, when it was too late for his father to dig into his ever-growing pockets. Sejanus wondered what his father would say about his plans. Sejanus could hear the lecture in his head: about all that his father sacrificed for Sejanus to have a better life than he could have had in Two, about how Sejanus never stopped throwing away opportunities because of his foolish district sentimentalities. Sejanus didn’t know what his father expected. Sejanus spent the first eight years of his life in Two, and it wasn’t like anyone in the Capitol made efforts to make him feel welcome. Sejanus was district, through and through, no matter how much money his father poured out to wash it away.

When the Peacekeepers came for him, Sejanus knew it was coming. Again, he got up and followed them wordlessly, without a fight. He felt a little unsteady on his feet. He had hardly eaten while being detained. But he tried to hold himself together as he and Lil, chained up, were loaded onto the Peacekeeper van. Lil was already shaking, her panic obvious. Sejanus held onto a single thought.

_ Maybe I’ll see Coryo one last time,  _ Sejanus thought. He almost immediately wanted to take the thought back. He didn’t want Coriolanus to  _ watch him die _ . And that was when it really set in for Sejanus. He was going to  _ die _ . The same panic that shook Lil began to sink its claws into Sejanus.

_ I don’t want to die _ , Sejanus thought as the van stopped and they began to lead him and Lil off. Panic turned into terror and adrenaline. Animal instincts to run, to escape, to  _ not let them kill him _ . Just like in the arena. But this was not the arena. There was nowhere to run. No way out.

As soon as the van’s doors opened, people began to cry for Lil. Sejanus wondered how it felt to have so many people care. At first, Sejanus couldn’t see anyone he knew. He was both upset and disappointed by it. Was it selfish to want to see Coryo just one last time? Sejanus knew that he had put Coryo through a lot already because he was so selfish. But Sejanus just wanted this for himself, no one else, no greater good. His dying wish, the only one that was possible, was to see Coriolanus  _ one last time _ . Because even though Sejanus never really got to have Coryo how he wanted to, they had become closer than Sejanus could have ever dreamed. Like  _ brothers _ . Yes, maybe Sejanus had become a  _ little  _ jealous of Lucy Gray but he cared for Coryo’s happiness too much for his own to matter there. If Sejanus had to stand by and help Coryo be with Lucy Gray with a smile on his face, didn’t he at least deserve one last, parting look at the man he loved? At the man who, if not loved, at least cared for him?

Lil’s legs shook so much that they gave out and she collapsed. Peacekeepers rushed over to lift her and haul her to the gallows. Sejanus followed. As the Peacekeepers led them, Sejanus saw him. Coryo.

Sejanus craned his neck, desperately trying to catch Coryo’s eyes. Was he avoiding his gaze?

_ There.  _ They locked eyes. Sejanus almost crumpled too at the sight of Coryo’s eyes: tortured, pained, and another emotion Sejanus struggled to place. Guilt? Sejanus wanted to assure Coryo that there was nothing for him to be guilty about. He couldn’t have done anything. He tried to talk Sejanus out of doing something stupid multiple times and Sejanus just didn’t listen.

“Coryo!” Sejanus tried to call out, but his voice wouldn’t come. It was trapped. But Coriolanus saw. Sejanus tried to convey his own pain, his own guilt, his own fear in his face.

The Peacekeepers yanked Sejanus away. They carried Lil and led him onto the trapdoors. Lil was finally able to stand on her own. They stood there, listening as a Peacekeeper read their charges. Well, Sejanus didn’t listen. He didn’t need to. He’d heard all of the words so many times before: from his father, from Coryo, in his mind. Sejanus stared ahead, at the people. He didn’t recognize many of them. He wondered if it would be worse if he did. He did recognize the Covey, though, standing near the front. Lucy Gray was wearing a gray dress, a black scarf, tears on her face. She met Sejanus’s eyes. Her eyes looked full of apologies. Sejanus tried to nod to her, though he couldn’t think of any real reason he would need to forgive her. But he didn’t want to die with issues unsettled.

The Peacekeepers came forward with the nooses, securing one around Sejanus’s neck. He was offered a blindfold but refused. He didn’t want to go out in darkness. He kept looking at the people.

Maude Ivory was there too, crying, holding onto Tam Amber’s leg. Sejanus couldn’t meet her eyes. It hurt too much. He was glad that they still had each other, at least. Their own little family. It made Sejanus miss his own family, though really only his Ma.

The drumroll began.

Sejanus wondered if anyone would sprinkle breadcrumbs over his body.

Who would remember the breadcrumbs? Coriolanus? Did Coriolanus know? No, he couldn’t possibly.

Suddenly, Sejanus felt so isolated. So alone. So unknown. So far from home. From Two. From anyone who actually knew. Knew him, knew his people. No, there was only one person who could make any of this right. Only one person Sejanus really needed right now. Only one person Sejanus would never see again. One person he never really got to say goodbye to. One person he missed. What he wouldn’t give to see —

_ “Ma!” _

The trapdoors opened.


End file.
